Mommy Mondays: One Month Left (and Why I'm Afraid of an Ugly Baby)

Today I'm one month away from my due date. You'd think, what with this not being my first rodeo and all, I'd be pretty comfortable with the idea of having a second kid. After all, I sort of know what to expect in terms of having the baby, and I have a pretty good idea of what sleep deprivation is all about. I know that beyond diapers, a crib, clothes, and a car seat, I don't really need all that baby gear that's still tucked away in storage, and I know that I can pretty much trust my instincts as a mom.

All that being said, I'm still terrified.

And one of the things I'm legitimately scared of is having an ugly baby. There, I said it. And I know what you're thinking: But Mara, you are such a stunningly attractive human being. How could you possibly think you'll produce an ugly child? (Just kidding.) A valid argument to this fear-of-ugly-offspring thing is that we did manage to produce one pretty cute kid already, so I have no reason to think #2 would be any less adorable. But what if all the cuteness got used up on #1? What if Jack was just a fluke? What if the nightmare I had last week comes true (I dreamt I gave birth to a kid with a full head of hair and a full set of teeth to match)?

See, last time I asked for a baby and I got a pony! You just never know...

In all seriousness, I think the ugly-baby fear is a more deeply rooted fear that I won't bond with this baby or love him as much as I love the one I already have. It's just impossible to imagine. Everyone tells me those fears will vanish the moment I see this baby, and I am inclined to believe them.

Just as long as he doesn't have a full set of teeth.