Monday, September 24, 2012

Mommy Mondays: On Our Own

For those who might not have seen, I blogged on Friday about my return to the work force. Today began week two of my new job as the Community Liaison Office coordinator at the consulate here in Yekat. I'm happy to report, so far, so good.

Well, sort of.

It's funny how I seem to project all of my insecurities onto Jack. Okay, okay, not so much funny as pathetic. But I have an awful lot of insecurities. They have to go somewhere, right? Just as I was terrified Jack wouldn't like Russian preschool because he doesn't speak the language, I was scared that my return to work would be traumatic in some way. And to be fair, the first few days were rough on both counts. But here we are, six days in, and Jack is doing swimmingly. I was gone all day today, from 8 am to 4 pm, and Jack was in good spirits when I walked in the door. He showed me his drawing from school, the nanny reported that Jack had been quite the gentleman (he never opens the door for me, thank you very much!), and he even said "до свидания" to her when she left, which is a vast improvement over the "NO!" she received every day last week.

Meanwhile, John was gone all day today for a business trip, so I walked to work, made my way into the consulate (I made a wrong turn the last time I did it without John, so yes, this is actually a big deal for me), ate lunch, walked to the mall, got groceries, got coffee with an American expat I found online, and took the tramvai home. ALL BY MYSELF. Personally, I think Jack and I both deserve a big pat on the back, don't you?

Here Jack goes again on his own...
But if I'm being honest, being away from Jack has been kind of hard on me, too. The truth is, Jack is my buddy. He's been my constant companion for nearly three years. I've gotten used to having my sidekick with me whenever I leave the house. (Hell, I've even had a built-in excuse for talking to myself all these years.) As much as I enjoy being around grown-ups and having a purpose outside of raising a little person, it's also kind of sad to know someone else is getting him dressed in the morning, feeding him his meals, and putting him down for his naps. I'm grateful we've had so much time together, and I feel very blessed to have found someone I can trust and who Jack enjoys spending time with.

But all the same, I'm gonna miss it. After all, what's not to love?


Shannon Sims said...

Yay! Congrats on getting out there and braving it all on your own! I didn't realize you were the CLO....that's what my mom did when we were overseas! I'm feeling the same way about being back to work the last few months and dropping Liam off at daycare. Feeling bad about having someone else take care of him. Not sure why it's hard this time than with McKenna! I love hearing your updates and seeing your pictures.

Anonymous said...

Sheila...look what you have accomplished in such a short time....way to go and your confidence will just grow more each day. It is hard to leave the little one and look at how he's growing and changing. Seems like he is adapting well too. Love the pic of the bath boy...adorable :-) Love your updates and pics as well...enjoy, have fun and celebrate all that you are ;-)

Anonymous said...

Yes, I'd say you totally deserve a pat on the back. I think it's hard to do, but sounds like you're making it work. And Jack is such a cutie. I can understand how it'd be hard on you both, but it sounds like you guys are adjusting. I hope things continue to get better and better!

Peggy Eddleman said...

You deserve a HUGE pat on the back! I wish I had a fraction of your bravery!